Endure to the End

This phrase is a lot easier said than done. The MTC has been really hard this first week. I didn't realize how difficult it would be to wrap my head around the fact that I really have left life as I know it for a year and a half!! But I know that there is no way, save it be through God, that we can endure to the end. We can't do it alone - and Thursday night taught me that lesson with a HARD slap in the face!

Thursday was by far the hardest day for me. I woke up, got ready, then started personal study with my district. I started writing in my journal and just started bawling. So I stopped writing in my journal and tried something different.. patriarchal blessing.. started crying again. Opened some notes from my setting apart . . . cried.  Opened the scriptures.. cried. I thought everything was hopeless. Then we went to lunch. So I had calmed down a bit by then. Then class started. Cantonese for the next 6 hours with an hour break for lunch. I was able to contain myself during all the Cantonese lessons and what not. But then we had a devotional and the tears came back. I cried for 5 hours straight! I couldn't stop!!  So by 10:30 I had all the sleeping pills in me you could possibly take, and said a 'quick' prayer (not meaningful) in Cantonese and went to bed. This day was a SLAP in the face but taught me something really valuable! YOU CAN NOT DO IT ALONE!! ANYTHING!! Relying on the Lord and humbling yourself is essential if you plan to stay afloat!!

SO Friday morning I realized what I had done wrong the day before. I was complaining in my mind about everything. I had negative thoughts about everything. (which gets you nowhere..) and I wasn't praying hard enough. I was complain-pray-ing. (This is not how you should ever pray by the way.. bad things happen.) God has a mighty powerful hand!

I can testify right here right now that God is there. He will carry you! Just like that story of the footprints in the sand,  you see them when life is easy and smooth sailing, but when life gets hard, you can't see them anymore. Its not because Christ has abandoned you or left you to fend for yourself.  It's because he is carrying you. I know that these last 4 days have been easier and more fulfilling because of God and His love, mercy, compassion and atonement. He knows us, He knows how we feel, ALL THE TIME . . . and he WILL NOT abandon you.

Cool experiences:

We have an investigator from Hong Kong China. Her name is A- Ching. She got here three weeks ago. She is the cutest thing in the world. I love her so much. There is a problem though, she doesn't speak English! HOLY LANGUAGE BARRIER!! BUT!! The gift of tongues is REAL! It wasn't just a story about Jared and the Brother of Jared. Its REAL!

We were sitting in our second lesson with A-ching and we were having a really hard time communicating and the Spirit was leaving... ( probably because I was starting to give up, oh my poor companion). So finally I just asked her in Cantonese, how are you feeling, what are your thoughts?  I suddenly thought to myself, "Sister Webb! Why did you just ask that!? There is NO way your are even going to know what she is saying, there was no point in that question!" So she starts talking again, "alskdjfpoqiu bpn lkajsdhfok jkaadfh oahsdf " and on and on. SUDDENLY I realized, I KNOW WHAT SHES SAYING!! I understood her concerns, I understood where she was struggling! She was concerned about how you can tell the difference bet​ween your thoughts and Heavenly Father's, and a she was confused about how to feel the Spirit. She said she had missionaries teach her once, and they stopped in the middle of the lesson and said, "A Ching, do you feel that? That's the Holy Ghost".  She said she couldn't tell what they were talking about, so she was worried that her and God don't connect with each other very well. I COULD UNDERSTAND HER!! I was literally struck dumb. I could not answer! I just stared at her when she finished, turned to my companion and we both were like, "Did you get that?" and we both nodded and looked back at A- Ching, then back and each other. It was insane!

Then came the real problem... we couldn't talk back. I tried to say, 'We understand! We have both felt that way before!  It's normal at first when you're trying to recognize the Holy Ghost!',  but she just busted up laughing.. (:At least I tried! I have no clue what I said haha (: But my companion cleared things up and we were able to finish with A-Ching saying the closing prayer. It was beautiful!!

I have so many experiences to share, but not enough time. Its okay though. That was one of my favorites.

Also Sundays are amazing! I have the best zone and district! And a girl from school in in my zone! JC Hansen for those who know her, as well as a kid from my Chinese Star Talk camp! It's really been a neat experience so far. Stressful to think that I still have 8 weeks left, and some of my closest friends are just down the street.. that's a bit gut wrenching :( It's okay though. God's holding my hand through all of this. He keeps reminding me that if I can't think about enduing to the end, then just endure to the end of the day, class, or hour. Enduring to the end is a daily thing. You can do it! AND a huge thank you to all of you who helped me get out on this mission that HAVE served before!  This is the hardest thing I've ever done, and my respect goes out to you for enduring to the end! Thank you for your examples! Love you ALL!!

Ngoi wuai Jimuih ( love Sister Webb)

Me and my companion, Sister Milan

She speaks Hiligaynon and Tagolog and English and soon Cantonese! GOALSS!! I love her so much, she is literally the cutest thing in the world! 

Sister Rodaabaugh and I went into the MTC the same day!  We have grown up together in the same neighborhood and I LOVE her so much!

My friend, Brooke, who saved me in my Statistics class last semester!!

Our Amazing District!

Instead of walking around the temple grounds today, we ended up walking around the track because some of the Elders in our zone didn't bring coats for Hong Kong:)

Our Amazing zone!

Elder Banahit received his endowment today and we all go to attend with him!  It was an incredible experience for us.  He also speaks the same 3 languages that Sister Milan speaks!