Feeling Overwhelmed Can Be A Good Sign

This week I was so overwhelmed.  In Cantonese we have a phrase . . . we say "I'm feeling buhngaausih."  This week I totally buhn gaau sih'ed my life away. Let me tell you my story.

We had an incredible district/zone meeting. Sister Chan & I are the only Sisters in our zone of about 14 Elders, so we pretty much anything we say goes. (: In our meeting I was asked to teach.  I had been thinking about pride and how we often forget that we are simply instruments for the Lord.  I thought about how everything is given to us from the Lord.  We need to be careful not to think WE are doing the work as missionaries.  What instrument has ever taken credit for the beautiful music or art it produces?  NONE.  The artist takes credit and our true artist is the Lord.  I then shared my thoughts about how the Lord needs competent and fine tuned instruments, so we are needed in this work, but we need to work together in unity and remember who the true artist is.  I know Heavenly Father loves us and needs us.  If we listen to the Spirit, He will guide us individually.  Sometimes I feel that He is more willing to help us than we are willing to be helped!

As missionaries we REALLY want His help, but sometimes we ignore or make excuses to not listen to Him.  As a zone, we all decided to humble ourselves and then we talked about our goals.  We decided to be out working hard and looking for people to talk to from 9am-9pm each day. We also committed to only say prayers of gratitude and we set a goal to get a certain number of investigators.  Ready for the results . . .

Tuesday - we went to find a LA's (less active’s) apartment and when we finally got to the building, we pressed the button for the 10th floor.  Some people got off at the 5th then the 9th. When the 9th floor door closed, the elevator went back down to ground floor!  We pushed it 5 times and it finally went back up, got to the 9th floor and shut down. We were so confused, so we hesitantly pushed it and went to the 10th floor.  The second we walked out, something was not right. We said a prayer, opened the Book of Mormon and came across a scripture that said, "In dangerous circumstances" We knew we needed to leave ASAP!  We left some banana bread the door and a note and took off.   On the way out we ran into a girl named Andrea who recognized us from McDonalds. We told her about the love God has for her and invited her to learn more.  She said yes and we got her number. Then after that we needed to get back to our apartment quickly.  We got walking and saw a bus stop that had a bus that goes straight to our apartment. We flagged down the bus driver, but he 100% ignored us and drove right passed us!! RUDE!   There was a reason though . . .Sister Chan turned around and started walking and said, "Maybe there's someone God wants us to meet!"  Off we went, still a 30 min walk from home. Pretty soon we saw a boy and his shirt said Wesley.  I started saying his name and making weird pronunciations out of it until he turned around with a cute little smile on his face. This kid is the definition of prepared. We walked home with him and shared the restoration, said a prayer with him, and invited him to meet with us the next day and pray that night.

Wednesday- Met Kitty!  We had been out all afternoon, and we were finally walking back to the house. We stopped to buy some chocolate milk because it sounded good, and on the way out we saw Kitty and ran right over to her. She gave us her number and said she was willing to meet to learn more. Then a lady on the bus that afternoon leaned over and asked if we could exchange numbers. What!? Never happens.

Thursday - taught a LOT of lessons, and had dinner with an amazing family.  We also met Paul on the bus.  He told us he is having troubles getting over feelings of revenge that he has towards his father, and he knows that it was not a coincidence that we met and asked for his number.  Then he told us he knows we can help him and he wants our help. We also met Bob in KFC and taught him the restoration, and he wanted to learn more!!  You'll see a picture of him below.  He SERIOUSLY looks just the KFC Colonel!

Friday- Ella.  We met Ella. She is 19 and also was ready to hear the gospel.  We found Ella and her friend, Rita, on the street just standing on some stairs. The Spirit prompted us to talk with them. We first talked about how acquainted they are with the Spirit. Ella and Rita both have felt it and they described it as a feeling of peace that will sometimes lead them to tears for no reason. So we took advantage of the peaceful feeling right then and there and shared the restoration with them. They were astounded. They wanted to meet again and scheduled us for the next day.   They promised to pray that night.  Then that night we got 4 different referrals! FOUR!! God PROVIDES!!!

Saturday and Sunday... my buh gaau sih or overwhelment . . . EVERTHING FELL THROUGH!  Wesley, Kitty, Rita, Reno, Ku, Kenneth, Paul, Bob . . . GONE! They all cancelled.  Some blocked our numbers and we were left empty handed. Everything we had in our hands was taken in one day! God gave gave gave gave and then in one second, the people exercised agency and boom! GONE! I didn’t understand! I think it was the first time in my life I knelt in prayer and cried to God with pain and doubt and complete confusion! Why why why why!!!??? I didn’t get it! I felt so overwhelmed that all the potential just slipped right out of our hands!! For a split second I blamed God. My comp had the idea to open up to the conference talk "Walk With Me" from May 2017. This talk will explain the weight I felt on my shoulders and the answer to my prayer, so read that when you finish reading my email. It’s by Elder Eyring.  It goes hand in hand with my email today. Everything has a purpose. Everything has a place and time, and I think God tested me to the brink.  It was really overwhelming . . .  

I love being a missionary, as hard as it is sometimes. But God has a purpose for everything under the heavens, so stay strong.  Trust in God’s will.  He loves us and is more willing to bless us than we are to receive his blessings!! Let heaven open up and pour blessings upon you, and when they close, keep saying prayers of gratitude for what you have! Love you all!!

Love, Sister Webb

My MTC group!!

Love my comp!

Dinner with the Bishop

Teaching the youth to dance

Beautiful HK

Time for a haircut . . . 

Pretty good eh?

Our friend, Stanley 

Subject to Change

If you come on a mission and do not expect to change, you will go and return in vain.  This is my own adaptation of a line in the white handbook.  A mission is meant to change you and if we don’t let it change us, then we literally have gone and will return in vain. We had a really powerful mission leadership conference this last week and the main focus was on repentance.  Then TODAY we have a conference with Elder Stevenson from the Quorum of the Twelve!  It is also going to be focusing on REPENTANCE! *hint taken...

So as I've been saying this transfer has been really hard so far. But my companion has been really supportive and very patient and loving with all my many faults. Love ya Sister Chan!

So our investigator, Tracy, told us this week that she has been thinking about baptism  As we were walking home one night she said, “Guys, I want to go on a mission.." Me and Sister Chan just froze in our steps!  We hadn’t brought up baptism all night because we didn’t want to stress her out about it, but then I put my arm around her and said, “That’s amazing Tracy.. but first, you need to be baptized. She takes a deep breath in and says, "Fine. I'll pick a date this week." So now Tracy is in Thailand on a school trip building houses and teaching English, but we met one of her good friends going with her and told him to remind her to pray every night! He laughed and promised he'd do his best (friend is not a member #refferalwaitingtobebaptized)

Then we have Leo. Leo totally stood us up this week.  In Chinese it’s called "fong" when this happens.  This didn’t stop us though! We hunted down his location and we found him! He was actually at a restaurant with a man in our ward! I love members who take the first step to fellowship our investigators!  We met with him and encouraged him to really start thinking more about his baptismal date for April 1st and really try to prepare himself.  Then we had calls with President Lam.   It turns out the YSA in HK rented out a clubhouse over on the island Cheung Jau.  They are going there to play from March 30 to April 1st, and Leo's baptismal date is April 1st. President tells us in this call that if Leo is ready, “organize it with the YSA  council and get him baptized in the ocean!"  We pulled Leo aside after church and told him the exciting news! (He's 19 by the way).  He freaked out and said, "I’m not ready, no! No way! I’m soooo not ready!!" We calmed him down and promised him with the help of the ward and with our help, the Holy Ghost and Jesus Christ, he can be ready! He puffed out his chest and said, “Okay, ya, let’s do this!!" haha (: Keep him in your prayers!!

So anyway, as I’m seeing these people progress and repent it is changing my life. I found the most amazing scripture this week.  It’s1 Corinthians 9:19:  "For though I be free from all men, yet have I made myself servant unto all, that I might gain the more" This is a mission and repentance in a nutshell. As President Hinckley’s dad told him on his mission, "Loose yourself and get to work!" This requires you to "Come unto Christ" and to "be perfected in Christ".  These were just phrases to me until I came on a mission and really started to learn the nature of Christ. When President Monson came out with the 2013 initiative to "Come unto Christ", he had the hope of changing all the lives of the youth in the Church.  I remember being 13 and didn’t really understand what this meant.  As I have been studying these words, "Come unto Christ", they have had a much more profound influence on me.  I’ve learned that this can mean "come unto faith, come unto repentance, come into, love, kindness, charity, patience, diligence."

Anyway, I love you all! Really try to repent and change your nature this week.  The Sacrament is the only ordinance of salvation that you take over and over for yourself, so cherish those 10 minutes you have to come unto Christ, and commit to change and be better this week than you were the week before!

Love you all!

Love, Sister Webb

Cheese cake factory with the Sisters!

Cheng out with Tracy and Gam Family

I exploded the washer!

Sister Chan & I

Misison Leader Council

Getting ready for dance class . . . 

Dinner at Bishop's Home

Teaching the youth how to dance

kap hei fu hei.. kap hei fu hei..

This week was a bit more smooth transitioning into the new area. It's a lot harder than I thought it would be.  Whatever the reason I have had a hard time being excited for the next day haha. Happens sometimes.. (:

This week has been quite interesting though. My companion is a dance major and started a dance class as part of a missionary outreach effort.  For those of you who know me, I really don’t dance very well . . . occasional spastic movements and usually nothing very coordinated!  While she has been preparing for this class, I’ve been able to study conference talks!

When I read these talks I feel like the world just stops for a minute.. that is my breath in breath out moment of every day  (kap hei fu hei.. kap hei fu hei... is how we say it in Cantonese). I have literally fallen in love with General Conference talks! I remember when I was in high school my mom loved to listen to general conference talks almost daily!  I was more the Justin Bieber, Taylor Swift, One Direction kinda girl.  I remember she always had these talks going and I would get so annoyed that she wouldn’t just turn on some music or something!  You know that song from Tangled, "Mother Knows Best"?  In Cantonese we say it like this:  TIU KAP JANSAHT GE WOH!!! SO TRUE!! My mom always had it right!  She always had her heart in the right place. wise wise wise. Haha!  As I was reading General Confine talks this week, I felt like I was turning into her! haha (: love ya mom (:

So we taught a really good lesson this week to one of our investigators, Tracy. I am amazed at the desire this girl has to change. She is only 17 and she knows that she needs to change. I think the fact that this gospel is actually true hasn’t quite seeped into every part of her yet, but she is sensing the goodness of it.  That’s a step in the right direction, so now we just have to narrow the gate a little for her.

Hope you all have a great week!  Remember to listen to the amazing talks from General Conference, think specifically how they apply to you, and then act on what you hear!!

Love you all!

Love, Sister Webb

Yummy lunch date with our investigator, Tracy!

Loved meeting with Tracy . . . 

Sis. Chan is quite the baker!

Here we are with the Kowloon City Elders

Dance Class

Another investigator, Leo

I dropped the remote to our A/C out the window accidentally, and somehow IT SURVIVED!!  MIRACLES!

A Little Harder Than I Expected . . .

This week was not what I thought. I did have a little fear in me moving to a new area, but I did not realize the emotional toll, both physically and spiritually, it would take on me. Kowloon city (KLC) and Tsim Sha Tsui (TST) are great areas, but moving here was not what I was expecting.  It was full of tears and a bit of heartache. I was talking to this Elder in my new district while my companion was doing reports and we were talking about how coming on a mission was nothing like we thought it would be, and how when we move we feel like we are back at square one. We have both been asked by other people, “Well, what did you think it would be like?” Neither of us have a response. I don’t know what I thought a mission would be like, but I do know now that you cannot FULLY prepare yourself physically, mentally, emotionally or spiritually. In the end though, I came down to the conclusion that there will always be hard days, weeks or months.  As Elder Stanley G. Ellis said, "The constant is the hard, the variable is your reaction to the hard." And so this week I really have needed to focus on my reaction. I have felt very inadequate and full of fear.  I realize those are not feelings of the Spirit and found myself quite miserable.  I needed to change my reaction!

So now I'm over in TST and there is no going back, even though I wished at one point or another that I could phone President and tell him to rethink this transferJ  But I know it wasn’t him who sent me here. It was God and He has His reasons.

So now onto being positive! So the KLC ward had a big hot pot dinner and it was a blast. The ward was so welcoming and so funny. I loved getting to know them and they seemed very excited to have me. . . that was a tender mercy.  The Cantonese in this area impresses me.  It’s different from the way they speak in Teun Mun and it seems easier for me to understand, so that’s a blessing!!

I felt so grateful to sit in Sacrament Meeting this week and partake of the sacrament. I needed a renewal of energy and hope and that’s exactly what it did for me!  It was even meaningful to attend our two wards and have DOUBLE the chance to reflect on my Savior and His Atonement.

Our two main investigators over here are the sweetest things.  Tracy is 17 and Leo is 19.  They are really sweet and have a strong desire to change their lives.  We're excited to see what God has in store for them, and I'm excited to get to know them better!

This week I really liked the scripture Jacob 4: 6-8. God shows us our weaknesses that we may know by His grace and His great condescension unto the children of men that we will have power to do ALL things.  We really are in His hands, and when we struggle and feel inadequate, turn to Him and thank Him for the grace and mercy He has to shown unto you, even in your weaknesses, so you can change them to become more like him!

I love you all! Hope you have a good week!!

Love, Sister Webb

Saying goodbye to Sis. Perez and hello To Sis. Chan

Hot Pots!

I'm Moving!

11 months in and I’m finally moving!! My feelings are all over the place, but overall I am excited! I’m excited to get going with a new ward and do better than I did here in Butterfly. BUT Butterfly will always be home to me!

This week has been crazy! I learned so many lessons!  I wish I could tell the people of HK that "if you don't have time to read the scriptures and pray, then you are busier than God ever intended you to be"!  The members have been hanging this up all over the church buildings in every area.  I love it so much and it makes me laugh. So friends and family . . .  from the people of Hong Kong: "If you don't have the time to read the scriptures or pray, then you are WAY busier than God ever intended you to be!"

This week we had transfer calls and we did a big zone conference call.  There were 27 of us were on the phone at one time! It was so exciting to see where everyone was going!

Then the missionaries in my area had a zone conference.  It was also really good, but I was sick again that day, so I was in and out.  I love being with everyone! Then yesterday was my last day in the Butterfly Ward. That was sad. SO MANY PICTURES!  BUT they are all really excited to see me again in June when my parents come, so it wasn't good bye yet haha (: Then the Relief Society president and her husband invited ALL the missionaries in our district (eight of us) over to teach us how to make Chinese New Year desserts. I wish some of the missionaries there would have been more mature and taken these good members seriously.  The members were so sincere but some of our Elders would not stop making fun of him in English, the poor man doesn't even know English. We need to always be aware of the people around us. It reminded me to be careful not to come off ungrateful to people. It’s not a good feeling to be around or to cause.

This week I read a talk called "Beware Of Pride" by Pres. Ezra Taft Benson.  WOW!  Profound words in that talk!  I feel like pride is like the common cold . . . everyone will Catch it. So as I was reading this talk I saw pride as this creature, this creature being the natural man.  As natural men and women we seem to catch this a lot!  Sometime we are prideful enough to see it in others and not in ourselves, or to take offense, or to be prideful looking down on people, or prideful looking from the bottom up.  There are so many forms of pride and it seems to me we have a DAILY battle with this creature!  We need to keep our shield of humility, love, faith, and patience up at all times, because Pride is trying to attack us 24/7. The second you let down even the shield of patience, the creature enters your being and you have to fight even harder to get rid of him!  Had you just kept your shield up, you may have defeated him for that day! So if you haven't read the talk "Beware of Pride", I would encourage you all to read it. It is something we ALL need to hear.

I have one last story. . . I was talking to this man on the train.. well trying to talk to this man on the train.  He gave me one look and said, “I have another religion and I don't want to hear anything you have to say.”   So with all the people around us listening to the conversation a WAVE of embarrassment flooded me, but I turned and tried again, explaining that I wasn’t going to try to talk to him about the church, I just want to talk with him as a person.   Then he repeated even louder that he had no interest and that he didn't want to talk to me.   So now full of embarrassment and a little bit of frustration, I asked him if he knew any English?  He takes his glasses of and he says, "Yes, now will you please leave me alone!" I turned and started talking to the person next to him and had quick but nice conversation, said bye to the both of them and got off the train. It blows me away the hardened hearts of the people in these last days. It’s hard to see people’s hearts so closed and full of pride . . .

Stay strong!!  Love you all!

Love, Sister Webb

Some of my favorite members in Butterfly!!

Saying GOODBYE's at Church